Friday, January 15, 2010

43 Years Ago

It's my Birthday. What is it about birthdays that make you ponder life. I woke up, like any other morning, basically crawling to the coffee maker (I have a Keurig one cup coffee maker). I was wondering, like every morning, why I am the only one in the world who has to get up before the sun rises to either get kids off to school or go to work.

Made my first cup, turned to get milk from the fridge, and saw the flowers my husband had left on the counter. Something clicked in my brain, "Oh yeah, it's my birthday". I don't feel like I just turned 32 today (that's if 29 is 40). I think I should do something different this year. I never make New Year's resolutions, I think they're stupid. They always focus on what we shouldn't do, or a list of 20 things that I need to do to be happy in addition to the 20 million things I already do.

So, as I was driving the kids to school, after we saw Officer Jackson hiding with his radar on and Samantha said "Mom, how many tickets has he given you anyway?", I started to think about the next year of my life. And it's only 2 tickets.... from him. I'm not a fast driver, I'm just ADD, and my mind tends to wander when I'm driving and before I know it, I'm going 75 in a 55!

I made a decision that 2010 is going to be different! This is the year of "doing",the year of "more God, less me", the year of "rise above the BS", the year of "no more wasted potential", the year of "strengthening my friends". No, I'm not starting a ministry or small group. I'm not teaching a class about it. I'm going to live it, one day at a time.

I believe creative people have interesting backgrounds, kind of like nurses. I think that your past directly influences your creativity. I think that if creative people fully understood the gifts that God gave us, we would have less wasted potential. But creativity threatens the enemy, and so many creative types are under the influence of oppression and don't even no it! Because we are tortured by our past, or are caught up in the crap of a bad relationship, or are overwhelmed because we over commit ourselves, even when we are doing it for good reasons! We make bad choices that consume us. It's all a distraction from the life God wants us to live. See, God made us for HIM, for HIS purposes, he gifted us with unique talents and personalities so HE could use them through us. God's not meant to fit into MY schedule somewhere, when I have time, when I'm not consumed by arguing with my husband and yelling at my children, or gossiping at work and feeling important because I'm involved in a multitude of activities at church. Those are all the distractions of the enemy, when I become so consumed with them that God has to take a ticket to stand in line... "Number 38, I'll take you over here Sir"

It's a small shift in thinking. God made me, for him. On my birthday in 1967, he rejoiced when I was born, he already knew that I would be sitting here today writing this story. Hopefully provoking people to exam themselves and ask him for guidance, looking at things a little differently, or calling me out because you disagree.

All because I was born 43 years ago.


  1. Wow. The most awesome, insightful, heart-ripping post you've written.

    Love your real-ness.

    Love you.

    Live like this, girl, every day - whether it's your birthday or not. Live it out.

    You're amazing. 'Cause God planned you that way...

  2. Angie you are so on point it's not even funny. The enemy really wants to get at people who have influeance. Creative influence is very past/pain fueled and it's almost like dancing with the devil. Right on the front lines leaving it all out to bear to be judged by the world. And so often we lose the battle and give in to the world and make God stand in line to talk to us. I aggree that 2010 has got to be the year where we call a spade a spade and recognize that we all have the ability to falter and fall. Only through doing this can we truly hear what God has to say and not have it fall on deaf ears. We can hear it, digest it, and then go out and DO IT!

    Happy Birthday Mrs. D!